Sunday, April 26, 2009

Thoughts on my present situation

I have been thinking recently about traveling and finding ways for people to pay me to do so. This is the constant dilemma of every traveler in the world. Either finding a job that pays you to do what you love, or finding a way to fund it. Right now with me in school it seems really hard to find those opportunities that I can actually take advantage of. I mean, I still have the light house to go to during the summer, and I love it. But I miss being a part of the world, and I am honestly jealous as hell when past/present friends of mine tell me of their recent adventures or plans for the future. Even now I am getting ready to go for the summer and I am listening to my good friend Chris talk about how he is going to move to Calgary over the summer. 17 hours away.... I understand his need to move and travel and do something... just to have a change. I also know I am going to miss him terribly. Then there is Pat, who is living back in Europe, just returned from Morocco, has been to nearly every European country out there.... I am so jealous I want to scream! I hate being jealous, I don’t feel like it’s an integral part of my being, however here I find myself fixated on how I am not doing what they are.. how I am still here trying to do what I love and feeling trapped.

I have talked about this with Tom, he doesn’t have the same urge to travel, in fact only wants to do it if it has purpose. No real desire to be a part of the ‘world sphere’. I understand it, but it is really hard to rectify those differences. I would love to find a job with a company that encourages or pays me to go all over the world and do things, however, there are a lot of people with the same desire as me. Thus making this increasingly difficult to set myself apart from everyone else.

All I can do, is train, seek out certifications, try and meet as many people as possible and take every opportunity that comes my way... only then can I see the world through people.

Nic

2 comments:

Chae said...

I feel you on that. I'm currently torn between my plan from last year to move to Portland in a couple months, and this recent opportunity for a master's program while living rent-free with my friend in England next year.
For what it's worth, your lighthouse makes me intensely jealous.

Patrick said...

Sorry to make you jealous, but if it makes you feel any better I see the same situation looming for me in the future. When this current stint is up I have to figure out a way to be able to still go out there and travel and either be able to afford to do it or get paid to do it. You could always get your TOEFL certification and go that route.